Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
