at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
