She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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