Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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