It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
