Tell her she can't have a vagina
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
