Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
