They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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