hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
