He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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