Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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