Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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