I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize