idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just want to make out with him forever
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
