Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
