Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
