Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
