ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
