i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
