I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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