It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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