he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize
