Her vagina should come with caution tape.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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