when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
