Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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