What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
if only i could text you this smell
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
