I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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