I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize