I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
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