is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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