OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize