Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize