he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
