He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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