I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
