If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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