How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
