if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
