May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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