ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Randomize