you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
