what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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