She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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