Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
