So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
