Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
