Is it normal to miss your booty call?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
