So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I don't think brook has ever known best
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He keeps bees of course he's weird
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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