So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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