I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
