Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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